Monday, March 24, 2008

Mary Oliver- "The Journey"

One day you finally knew

what you had to do, and began,

though the voices around you

kept shouting

their bad advice -

though the whole house

began to tremble

and you felt the old tug

at your ankles.

"Mend my life!"

each voice cried.

But you didn't stop.

You knew what you had to do,

though the wind pried

with its stiff fingers

at the very foundations,

though their melancholy

was terrible.

It was already late

enough, and a wild night,

and the road full of fallen branches and stones.

But little by little,

as you left their voices behind,

the stars began to burn

through the sheet of clouds,

and there was a new voice

which you slowly

recognised as your own,

that kept you company

as you strode deeper and deeper

into the world,

determined to do

the only thing you could do -

determined to save

the only life you could save.

And so it begins....

With still a bit of a cough, I got out there at 5:30am this morning and ran 10km.

It was quiet.

No wind and just the sound of my feet. There is no better therapy for the mind.

I started off at a good jog. Everything abotu teh run felt goos. Which is strange because of how sick I have been lately. I had a bit of water at km 3... but then didn't feel i needed any until i finished.

I am determined to get a road bike by the end of April. And tweak my running and swimming until then...

mmmmmm...

it sure feels good to be running outside again...

:)

Sunday, March 23, 2008

An easy day ahead...

Yesterday started out aweful....

I mean the kindof aweful that makes you want to run for the woods and never come out.

My furnace needed to be bled, and honestly I felt up to the task... but after an hour of fighting with it... I decided it deserved some professional attention. Monday was the earliest this could happen. So I put it out of my mind.

I send the kids to my moms and headed up to Moncton to Mike's Bike Shop and learned about triathlon bikes and the gear. The store really surprized me. The science behind the bikes... I was inspired to learn more.

I feel up to the swim and know that i can get help training for that...

I love to run so that isn't an issue... but the bike.... ug.... I really should have a street bike.

Andre was very kind to explain things down to my level. From the gears, the pedels, and the differences between all the bikes... he has been doing triathlons for 15 years and it is impossible to not be effected by his passion for the sport.

I came back to Amherst convinced that i can do this.

:)

With that said, this morning I have accepted that it will be an easy day. Kale and Drew and Haven are all suffering from a virus that i am slowly recovering from. There will be some coloring and a movie or two. And fruit slushies... mmmmm...

Friday, March 21, 2008

a turn for the worse...

I considered posting a picture....

but no...

:)

My finger is bad... really bad...

I know my pain limits, and yesterday i knew instinctively that something was really wrong. Much more wrong than just a hurt finger.

It is infected.

So today, I cleaned the cut out myself and put some hydrogen peroxide on it....

It has since swollen worse and i can barely bend it..

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

I hate not being at 100%. I know that it is just a finger.... but sheesh... I have to go to the hospital again? Kyle will be here in 45 minutes and i am giong to the hospital for some meds to help with the infection...

no glue.... no stitches... just a bandaid and some meds...

did i mention

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR?

:(

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Kale Scott Whitten is 4....

Happy Birthday Kale!!!!!

Bad Dreams

last night was aweful...

I dreamed about the Bluenose Marathon all night long. I dreamed that I decided to do it again.... but i got lost, and it wasn't 42 km, it was 100 or more and ... they ran out of water stations... and then the dream took a strange twist and it was like a movie with men with guns... and suddenly i was Station Street, and Teasers and the old Enheat buildings were not there... the ocean was there ....

and there was a huge boat that i was invited to party on and we were jumping off the boat into the shark infested waters..........

ug...

You wake up from dreams like that exhausted...

:)

I need to go workout...

then yoga....

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

When a bad day gets worse, then you blog about it,... and your blog gets lost in "Internetland"

Such was my day yesterday,

My day was aweful.

Haven had another allergic reaction (maybe to eggs this time?) then cried most of the day. Later, I ended up cutting my finger bad enough to go to emergency...

and once i got home ...

I had enough of a sense of humour about the situation to blog about it all...

I wrote a big old blog..

(didn't save it... didnt; feel i needed to)

I hit send... and it was deleted.

:)

Yup and thus ended my day... after that, i was officially done... and I curled up into the fetal position and begged for mercy....

....

Not really....

But you get my point...

:(

I am not a fan of assuming the role of a "Hurt Person"...

I need to run at 100% or I sook...

and today, I am Debbob Sookiepants...

:(

Saturday, March 15, 2008

The hives...

Yesterday morning i noticed it...

Haven had very red feet and hands... then little hives started appearing.

I resisted the urge to take her to the hospital because #1: her breathing wasn't interupted yet... (and i was watching her closely), and #2: all they would tell me was something that i already new...

...find the source of the allergic reaction...

Then this morning when Kyle came over to get the boys he brought Haven. She seemed fine. Then I gave her a chocolate coin. Bright red hands and feet and huge hives...

... i told Kyle to take her to the hospital right away so they could see her at her worst...

After assessing the coin and what she had yesterday before her outbreak... I have come to the conclusion that it might be chocolate....

or it might not be...

:(

within 10 minutes she was cryign an dher hands and feet were covered in

Friday, March 14, 2008

failure #2...

OK...

It is a good thing i do not take failure personally because

OMG....

I forgot to buy hot chocolate and when the kids asked for it, i loooked in my cupboard and found the LL Bean hot chocolate my mom bought me...

So i attempted to make it...

it was aweful...

i even tried to add chocolate milk...

but nothing could save it...

:(

Plan B...

?????????????????????????

:)

smile... and suggest a game?

Kryptonite....

yes... it was a miserable failure...

my green jello never set and tasted aweful...

I mean seriously, how bad of a cook do you have to be to screw up Jello?

Welcome to my world...

:)

Despite the Jell-o disaster, the party is going well...

The drumset is in contstant use and Superhero Jeopardy is going to start in about 30 minutes...

Honestly, it is almost too much fun to see the other parent's faces when they drop their kids off...

:)

They just cannot believe that i would want 9 kids in my house overnight...

But i ask... why wouldn't I?

My kids have a blast, the other kids have a blast, i have a blast... and because I invite the siblings of the kids, the parents of the kids actually get to go out and do something fun...

:)

fun fun fun....

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Spring fever...

Myles wants to go biking bad...

As do I.

I cannot wait to hook up the bike trailer and take Kale and Haven out for a drive.

:)

This morning Myles and his friend woke up around 7:30am.... Logan's Mom came to get him around 9am and then Myles and I left for Tim Hortans. We had so much fun there. After 20 minutes of him begging me for math questions... (March break doesn't apply to this deschooling family) ... we then tore apart the box that his donut had come in and he wanted to make cell phones with the handles...

:)

our "pretend cellphones" even had the camera option... then i called Santa and the Toothfairy.... Myles was less than impressed...

:)

Today I have more planning for the Superhero Sleepovver party, Drew has a birthday party to go to, I have laundry and dishes to finish and 3 blogs to get on....

Right now I am watching Hulk to get questions written up for the Superhero Jeopardy...

things are good...

I would have liked to workout today but it wasn't in the cards... i think i will do yoga after the Hulk and then maybe again before bed...

Looking ahead to tomorrow, I want to get Myles a new winter jacket and get some groceries...

Monday, March 10, 2008

some weight loss...

I woke up with sore glutes this morning.

:)

And honestly, I wasn't expecting to see any weight loss... but there it was this morning, after i ate my banana. I've lost 3 pounds...

And I am ready for more...

I am completely motivated.

I have worked out the last 4 days in a row and I have decided to take today off...

The little Mommy group that we used to have before Christmas called "Chubby Buddies"... needs to be renamed to something more positive....

:)

Bikini Buddies...?

(not that i'd be caught in a bikini...)

but it reminds us what we are eating for... not for comfort... but for nutrician and energy ...

(well, maybe comfort sometimes... er..... rarely....)...

I am hoping to have a meeting Friday in the afternoon.

Back back to today...

I am having a fairly good morning.

I have alot I'd like to accomplish today and will not relax until supper.

Brush the dog, dishes, clothes put away, invites delivered, Library....

i better take off..

go go go

Saturday, March 8, 2008

all you need to say is "Bag Sale"....

I took my kids to the Library this morning and saw that they were having a "bag sale"...

and i hit the mother load...

for $2 dollars total.. ($1 dollar a bag)...

i got:

"Choose your own Adventure- the green slime"

"Heart of Darkness"

"Mommy I'm bored"

"ocean life"

"animal world"

"plant life"

"rules of the game"

"anne of green gables"

"close encounters of the third kind"

"the hobbit"

"one Earth"

"echos of Freedom"

"1 is one"

"the grand and wonderful day"

"what makes it go, what makes it work"

"the bike lesson"...

Friday, March 7, 2008

The results are in...

and..........

after waiting for an hour and 15 minutes beyond my scheduled time... I finally got in to see my surgeon. What a "card" this man is... :)

I mean the jokes this man knows... ug.... :)

When I finally re-directed him back to the situation at hand, I asked about my Cat Scan and he said that it is recommended that i have an ultrasound of my thyroid...

thats it...

(phew...)

:)

my thyroid...

what is my thyroid...

so i looked up my thyroid...

And found out... that i have an excuse to eat more dulse...

but i digress,

back to the knife in his hands...

:)

I am the proud owner of 4 brand new scars... (how's that for being positive...)

I go back in a week to get the stitches out...

...

and no swimming for 6 days....

a small blip in my training... but i'll just bike more...

:)

ere flying... and the nurse were in stitches...

the winds of change...

I have decided to see if the YMCA is interested in starting up a meditation class.

Right now I am in the process of writing up some of the benifits associated with Meditation

During each class, I could give out some information of what they are to expect... and then have the people sit quietly and encouage them to "come back to the breath"...

I am really no expert but i, personally, want to get better at meditation... so the class would be for me as well...

:)

I need to buy some pencils today and bike out to my Dr. Appointment... I get the results from my Cat Scan 2 weeks ago...

I am also getting cut. My surgeon is suspicious of a freckle or two.... or 5.... :P

but seriously, what is another couple of scars when i have so many now....

Well, I'm off....

:)

Thursday, March 6, 2008

Finally, some pain...

I woke up this morning and felt sore... It was fantastic.

:)

Finally I am pushing myself...

Yesterday I biked at the YMCA and then ran some...

My mind is a jumble of "to -do"'s.... I have no fewer than 5 blogs all set to write, floating in my head...

but my house needs my attention... lots to do...

Currently I am getting my stuff together, I am going to the YMCA to swim and then bike...

I think that I am still high from the feeling of pushing myself beyond what i am used to...

:)

Yay!!!!!

If it is to Be, it is up to ME!

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Takin a break... :)

I am finally sitting.

It has been a busy day. And it isn't over yet.

I had to go out this morning and do some errands. At noon I swam 40 lengths in 25 minutes (i was a machine...), and then I walked to Tim Hortans to read.

I stood at the counter and ordered a Coffee, hearty veggie soup and a whole wheat bun...

She repeaded the order back and said hot chocolate instead of coffee. I corrected her.

I brought my order to the table and placed the spoon in my soup. No vegetables to speak of...

ug...

I brought my broth back over to the lady and showed her that there was infact no vegetables in my "Hearty Vegetable" soup...

She gave me a look.

:)

I smiled and said I'll take a clam chowder instead. She got a fresh bowl out and got me a nice bowl of clam chowder...yummmmm..

I got back to my table and picked up my bun... it was white...

did i let that go? did i just chalk it up as an innocent mistake? ... heck no....I mean this just is not rocket science...

is it?

I brought the bun over and explained the mistake. She brought me a WW bun, but not before she whispered something in the other waitress's ear...

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

My compassion flew out the window until i sat back down...

I sat back down, to read a book on mindfulness, and my anger dissapated...

poof...gone... that poor girl obviously had more on her mind than my order...

:(

I am home now and am about to embark on a cleaning spree.......

10 minutes from now...

because right now, i am enjoying the stillness....

Monday, March 3, 2008

Thus far........

Well, I awoke this morning to the gental beeping of my cellphone crying out for power.

:)

I plugged it in and checked the time. A quick message to Kyle to figure out the schedule with the kids today and I realized that if I got ready in that very instant.... I could make it to a lane swim at the YMCA and have it done for the day.

Off I went, swam, sauna'd, then back home to collect my book and I headed to Tim Hortans to read a bit.

Henri showed up with Curtis and Austin and we sat together and chatted a bit...

Then i met up with Kyle and the kids and went out shopping and paid some bills.

The rest of the day involves taking teh kids to Moncton so they can spend their allowences and I can get some reading done.

I seriously cannot read at my house. There are 1,000 things that call my name...

laundry, dishes, the floors and the bathrooms...

my scrapbooking, my knitting....

even my yoga tape...

:)

I am currently experiencing a massive headache. I didn't have any tylonal for myself so I ate 3 of the kid's... blech....

(sigh)...

.

Sunday, March 2, 2008

Havenbob Brokentoepants

When i mentioned my swimming lengths at the YMCA the other day, I failed to mention Haven's encounter with (what I am saying was) a door.

While I waqsswimming, Haven and Kale were being babysat by YMCA staff.

After my 30 lengths, I sat in the sauna...

saaaaaaauuuuuuunnnnnnnnnaaaaaaaaaaa................................................

:)

After 5 minutes the babysitter came to the door of the sauna and told me that Haven was fine. (this is always a mom's first clue that their child might not be fine)...

She informed me that Haven's toe had been hurt, was bleeding, and she was screaming, but it was under control. I sat back and smiled and said "ok."

She obviously expected more of a reaction from me...

And had she uttered the words "ambulance" or "911"... yah i would have grabbed my towel and saught out my child...

But after 4 kids and thousands of bumps... a bleeding toe is nothing to run half crazed to the bathroom for...

But I could tell that the babysitter wanted me to follow her, so i did.

And honestly, Haven's toe looked AWEFUL!!!

:)

Dried blood on both feet, on the bottoms of her pants...

ug...

But the good news is: She can walk on it, and wiggle it, and doesn't cry, so I doubt that it is broken...

Saturday, March 1, 2008

swimming...

Yesterday was the beginning...

:)

I scheduled Haven and Kale to be babysat at the YMCA, while i swam 30 lengths...

It was hard going. I kid you not. I am not a swimmer. But i kept my spirits up knowing that i definately will only get better. The sooner John can meet me at the pool... the better.

:)

Today i need to get to the Superstore and try and find a babysitter so I can go out to Teasers tonight. My family is going out to help support a local man that has cance and my younger sister has requested my presence....

...